Flawed

By panda_eyed
It always strikes me odd that some of the prettiest girls can find fault with their bodies, whilst so many ugly men think they are god's gift to womenkind. But everyone has things about their body they don't like, and I am no exception.

The things I hate about my body:
1. My African nose - it is short, squat and flat, and inherited from my dad's side of the family. It results from Jamaican blood on both sides on the family.
2. Oily skin - combined with 1., this means that I have difficulty wearing glasses because they slip down my nose faster than a fat woman on a water slide.
3. Afro frizzy hair - I turn into Diana Ross everytime my hair evens hears the word humidity or moisture (remember that episode of Friends with Monica's hair?!) .
4. My right foot is about half a size larger than my left - annoying when buying shoes
5. Big calves - they're not unshapely, just wider than average, and I have trouble buying knee-high boots that will do up comfortably :|
6. My chicken pox scars - I got c.pox at the age of 21, and the scars were horrible, despite me not scratching (very much). They're fading now, but I'm still very aware of them.
7. Body shape. The places where most women put on weight first are bum and hips. For me, the first place it goes is my tummy, then arms and boobs. This means I have a relatively slim bum, hips and legs, and a weird body shape. Also, when I lose weight, the first place it disappears from is my chest :|

Today, I am wearing my new boots that I bought over the weekend. They are suede, knee-high, pointy-toed, stiletto kitten-heeled, with a puss-in-boots fold at the top, and gorgeous! They're not the kind of thing I normally go for, having quite square feet. But I wanted to look and feel a bit more feminine, and get out of my comfy New Balances. Despite making me feel quite sexy, they are causing me quite a lot of pain - it's a bit like trying to squeeze a cube into triangle-shaped hole because of my square feet and the aforementioned bigger foot. My left foot isn't so bad, but I have blisters on the right one already. I would put on a plaster, but that would only make the boot tighter and I don't think I could honestly fit it in there.. :(

The nicest thing that anyone has ever said to me about my appearance was after I had chicken pox and very self-conscious about the scars. He told me that my 'so called' flaws only added to the character of my face, and hence, more unique and more beautiful, in his opinion. Even though I didn't really believe it at the time, I've never forgotten that.
 

22 comments so far.

  1. Anonymous 4:27 pm, October 11, 2006
    I try not to think of all the 'flaws' about my body - most of them can't be changed and not worth the worry. Though I think your first sentence was pretty spot-on!
  2. michelle 10:59 pm, October 11, 2006
    I agree with Nikki, although I do think I have a tummy roll but people say its in my head...go to livs page I left what I was going to do on haloween there
  3. michelle 11:01 pm, October 11, 2006
    from livs page: totaly forgot to tell you what I am doing for the fancy dress week

    Monday Superhero- SuperDesigner gal, wearing plaid mini over blue tights, white bodysuit with SD pinned to it, blue sarong for cape and a plastic crown!!! with Pig Tails...

    Tues: halloween Bussn student, black suit, I heart Networking pin, rolly breifcase...hehe its a inside joke at school..we hate the bussn students because they are boring

    Wes- Pirate day blue tights under cut off shorts, black high heel boots, puffy white dress shirt and a red sash..maybe pirate hat

    Thurs- 80's jeans with leg warmers and high heeld boots, fake permed hair, loose sweater in a loud color, maybe I will put WHAM on it!

    Friday- I will be A Gansters Ho with black 3 inch platforms, Polkadot halter maybe a drawn in mole by lip, red lippy

    will take pics!
  4. michelle 11:01 pm, October 11, 2006
    oh forgot its Oct 30 that this starts
  5. Olivia 12:32 am, October 12, 2006
    I'll have some of your calves, coz my wee legs rattle around in boots. And then by way of contradiction I have these great thighs and bum. And have grown a tum. Nothing EVER reaches my boobs.

    Currently I am struggling with very oily skin. I am getting worse. Do you thnk it's because I am taking Omega 3+6+9 capsules?

    Do you find that by late evening, your facial oils sometimes start creeping into your eyes and making them burn? I do, whether I blot or not.

    What do I not like about my body?

    My skinny calves which don't match my butt, and neither does my flat chest. At least I have *something* in excess that somewhat approaches voluptuousness!

    A guy I know once told me I have a sexy stomach, and my ex told me I was lithe, but that was a year ago and now he seems impressed with my weight gain.

    When I lose weight it goes first from my face and fingers, so people can always tell I'm under the weather, and my rings fall off.

    Did you see the humidity hanging in the air after the heavy rain today? I bet you had a struggle with your hair!
  6. michelle 11:00 am, October 12, 2006
    gosh guys let not pick on our faults, we are all lovely in our own ways...

    and libbs my skin is combo, so its dry on cheeks oily in Tzone
  7. panda_eyed 11:11 am, October 12, 2006
    Nikki, good plan stan. I tend to do the same most of the time, although they annoy me and then I rant.
    First sentence is quite true - men seem so much more secure about their looks. Maybe they just don't show their insecurities as much.

    Oh wow Jia! Lol, I can't wait for pics! I bet you're going to drive all the men crazy - they just love a girl in costume, esp superheroes! Gangster ho will be the funniest I think :) Make sure you wear lots of bling too!

    Liv, you're quite welcome to some of my calves. I have quite strong legs because of them though. I could knock a grown man out with a kick if I tried ;)
    See? I am abnormal - not much fat reaches my little bum.
    I do get oily eyes - I notice that my eyeshadow gathers at the creases because of it, which annoys me. Hmm, I've started fish oils too, I wonder if that IS a factor?
    The same guy once told me my stomach was 'cute' when I was complaining about it's flabbiness. I think I should moan about my appearance less - he must have thought I was fishing for compliments! :)

    Jia, you're so right.
  8. michelle 8:42 pm, October 12, 2006
    we should look at the postives...like u have lovely eyes
  9. Anonymous 9:10 pm, October 12, 2006
    Your boots sound absolutely gorgeous!

    You are absolutely gorgeous too crazy lady!xxx

    I don't like my hips which are too big but then I have been told that they're very sexy and also that this person likes that they can reach all the way round my waist with their arm. (Random but I guess it shows that my waist isn't humungous?!)
  10. pink jellybaby 11:35 am, October 13, 2006
    so many women have hang ups and grrrrrrrrrrrrr those damn men!

    my ex had chicken pox scars and i loved them and my bf has a large scar that i love. it's all part of your character
  11. Olivia 9:39 pm, October 13, 2006
    Pandy, omigosh, you could be right. Fish oils. My oil in the past couple of months since starting it has been ridiculous!

    I may stop and see what happens...hang on, how did you know I had started on fish oils if I didn't mention it?
  12. Anonymous 11:44 pm, October 13, 2006
    REading this, I've suddenly realised that all the chicken pox scars I've been concious about since I was 8 are gone !! I used to like them actually....
  13. Anonymous 3:34 pm, October 15, 2006
    *calls for attention*
    Ladies & Gentlemen: A moment of your time please. I LIVED with Pandy for 9 months and I can ASSURE you that she is a hotty. Thank you for your time.
    PS I have 6 chicken pox scars, including one just below my right eye, but it's never really bothered me. Now I'm paranoid though. Does it bother everyone else?! It's ma fat ass, flabby arms and beer belly that really bother me ;o)
  14. Anonymous 9:32 pm, October 15, 2006
    Jia, aww thank you sweetie! *blushes*

    Amy, *blushes more* Gosh, you guys are way too nice!
    The boots are gorge, yes :) They feel a bit more comfy now that I've worn them a few times. I bought some sexy stockings this weekend, to wear with them ;)
    And you're fabulous Amy, v v sexy!

    Buttons, isn't it funny how secure men seem to be? Esp the big fat ugly hairy ones :)
    I guess I'll just have to learn to love myself, flaws and all!

    Silly Livvy, I knew you'd started on fish oils cos you mentioned it in your comment above! *giggles..* It was a long day huh? :)

    Boso, well there's hope yet :) I just have no patience..

    Aww Sez, *blushes further (if that's possible)* aren't you lovely? Even though that's so not true.. :)
    And shut yo' mouth - you're gorgeous!
  15. Anonymous 2:29 pm, October 16, 2006
    I'm positive I have seen your photo, Ms Panda, and I am sure these are all made up. Stop being so negative, you're pretty.

    Plus everyone has chicken pox scars!
  16. panda_eyed 2:53 pm, October 16, 2006
    Petey, aww thanks.. aren't you a charmer :) Now I just feel like I was fishing for compliments..
  17. Anonymous 8:49 pm, October 16, 2006
    *blush* You're such a sweetie to me..you may change your mind when you see me in person lol!
  18. panda_eyed 8:57 pm, October 16, 2006
    Amy, guaranteed I won't :p
  19. Anonymous 9:06 pm, October 16, 2006
    Lol. Never say never..you may just hate me!xx
  20. panda_eyed 9:09 pm, October 16, 2006
    or vice versa.. :p

    I think we should both go and get ourselves some self esteem now, don't you..? :D
  21. Anonymous 9:22 pm, October 16, 2006
    Am drinking raspberry vodka..you reckon that'll work instead? ;)
  22. panda_eyed 9:24 pm, October 16, 2006
    Mmmmmmmmmmmmm.. I don't know, but I don't think you'll care much after a few! Send some over pls!

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