Animals on the Underground

By panda_eyed
Leg room on the London Underground is a precious commodity - we already have to travel in cramped and uncomfortable conditions, and this is the one tiny little 'comfort' we have left. So, when someone puts their shopping in your leg space, it's not surprising that you get annoyed and suddenly territorial. The lady sitting opposite me this evening, on the way home from work, in a 4-seater booth, had a bag of groceries and stores it, not under her own legs, which is the unspoken etiquette of tube travellers, but right there in my leg space. Lady, what do you think you're doing?

There is a loaf of sliced bread right inbetween my two feet. So when I move my legs, as you do when you've been sitting in a confined space for any length of time, I accidently nudge the bread with my foot. Lots of exaggerated tutting ensues and she makes a huge show of shuffling bags round, although this bread still ends up in the same goddamn place when she's done. How much did I want to stick my size 5 straight into the heart of the loaf??

All the while, she has been sniffing away and wiping her nose the way a small child does, before they know any better. You know the one - wipe with the back of the hand, pushing upwards, starting from the knuckle to beyond the wrist. I. Was. Repulsed. To make it worse, in between wipes, she was digging around her nostrils with her fingernails. For crying out loud, use a tissue!

Multitasking to the extreme here, this eloquent lady was eating a bag of McCoys crisps - not normally mind - but one tiny itsy bitsy nibble at a time, chewing each nibble for minutes. As a result, she'd eaten about 3 crisps in the 40 minutes I'd been sitting there and it was driving me insane. I sat there wondering if I would be justified in snatching the bag from her and stuffing the entire packet, wrapper and all, in her gob. She didn't even stop the back-handed nose wiping all the way through this. Who can say they don't love this reasonably priced, clean, spacious London transport, full of the most delightful people?!

Anyway, if I know that I don't have enough room to move my legs, they start to ache - it's probably psychological, but it hurts. I almost longed for yesterday's journey home, when another delightful lady put her bag of heavy shopping on top of my feet. Bemused, I watched her, and waited for her to realise and remove the offending item. Upon realising that this wasn't going to happen (and that, yes, she was just that inconsiderate), I asked her to get the friggin' bag, the f*k off my feet. Not really, I did ask politely, but I would have said that, had I not been raised to be a nice girl. She did remove the bag and I was rewarded with many dirty looks and zero apology. Londoners!

Enough of ranting, check out this cool link - animals on the underground - I don't seem to be able to post pictures on blogger tonight, but it's amazing the things people can see in a tube map.

In other news, I found some strands of blonde hair amongst all my black curls today - cue blonde jokes - I have been called 'blonde' in the past, but this is ridiculous!

Also, I think I may have BB withdrawal when it finishes this Friday - how sad does that make me..? What will I do at 9/10pm every night? *Sobs* Does that mean I'll have to get myself a life..?!

15 comments so far.

  1. nikkipolani 9:39 pm, August 16, 2006
    Y'know, I think I'll stop complaining about L.A. traffic. Eeewwwww! So sorry about your disgusting travel partner.
  2. Olivia 12:48 pm, August 17, 2006
    Omigod I HATE backhanded nose-wiping!!!
    Have you ever seen the ones who wipe with the palm from the nose into the hair, yes it happens...

    Thankfully, I've never really encountered people who have been rude with their shopping bags.
  3. Flighty 2:09 pm, August 17, 2006
    I'm so glad that I very rarely have to use the Underground.
    The pictures on that link are good!
  4. Boso 2:51 pm, August 17, 2006
    That is disgusting. DISGUSTING.

    Nice link, it's funny how creative people get with the tube map !!
  5. Sunshine 3:01 pm, August 17, 2006
    I am planning a big Big Brother night on Fri. I have told The Boy to cook me dinner and i am going to have wine and Popcorn to see the end out. I am soooo dreading it PETE TO WIN
  6. bettyb 3:09 pm, August 17, 2006
    Let's make some stickers up bearing the legends 'Horrible!', 'Snotty!', 'Rude!' etc & discreetly put them on suchlike fellow tube travellers backs/bags/whatever, when they're not looking. Ha.
  7. panda_eyed 4:04 pm, August 17, 2006
    Nikki, I had to restrain myself from pulling yukky faces. Unfortunately there was no getting away from her!

    Livvy, I know! How gross is hand-wiping anyway?? The scene from Something About Mary comes to mind :)

    Flighty, you are v. lucky! If it's not people like that lady, it's big fat sweaty men with horrendous BO, taking up all your personal space. Yeuch

    Boso, I know! Those animals are cool huh? I especially like the 'hound' one - it looks a like ScoobyDoo.

    Ooh Sunny, how lucky are you? I wish I had a boy to cook for me! Glyn to win! See, it's meant to be, it even rhymes!

    Betty, you distract them and I'll get sticking. Ha! :)
  8. Pete_to_Win_Glyn_to_bin_;o) 4:30 pm, August 17, 2006
    UUUURGH! Train lady sounds HIDEOUS! You have the patience of a saint Pandy. I like betty’s sticker idea, go for it ;o)
    PETE TO WIN! I thnk Glyn's been funny but he's also been a bit annoying and he likes Grace! Yikky poo!
    I have a nice meal all planned for nags when he gets here on Friday night, I think we'll have to go and get a life as well, Lordy, what shall we do? It's outrageous! ;o) xxxx
  9. youngmum 4:21 am, August 18, 2006
    Don't worry blondes have more fun anyways ;o)
    And ewww about the train lady...
    oh and BB comes on everynight over there??
  10. panda_eyed 1:52 pm, August 18, 2006
    Ah Diva, Glyn is so much more interesting than Pete! Pete is lovely but he doesn't do much. It annoys me when he won't stand up to Nikki. Glyn is just the funniest :)
    I hope you have a lovely evening tonight, and enjoy Nags week off! I'll be thinking of you when BB is on! :)

    Hi YM, I'll have to evaluate my newly found blondeness and see if that's true! :)
    Yep, BB comes on every night. I think I might have to go into BB rehab!
  11. henk 2:47 am, August 19, 2006
    That lady sounded horrible! I would have bear stared her, actually she deserved a poo in her shoes as well!
  12. Boso 10:07 am, August 21, 2006
    panda_eyed...guess what the 3rd most popular search phrase is on my blog?


    Imagine that?
  13. panda_eyed 11:20 am, August 21, 2006
    Henkie, I'm sure you would have given her a fright with the bear stare! Lol would that be a bear poo in her shoes?

    Boso, wow! That's weird! I didn't think 'Panda_eyed' would be typical of something that people search for! Hmm!
  14. Boso 10:50 am, August 22, 2006
    Maybe you've got someone stalking you on the internet, lol !!
  15. panda_eyed 5:21 pm, August 22, 2006

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